An exhibition of work on God’s sovereignty in miscarriage…

LET THERE BE LIGHT #1-#7 – (ink on paper, 8 x 5 ½ in) These abstract paintings resemble map like structures. Each was made by dropping random ink blots on wet watercolor paper. This practice allowed me to breath and experiment through the forms on the page with lines and shapes. I wonder if this is any close to how God felt when He formed the mountains and valleys?
XY – (ink on paper, 10 x 10 in) “And from the dust of the earth He made man…” Man was made to bring order and beauty to the earth, to create more life, and flourish. This is true masculinity. The blue is steady and beautiful. The lines bring order.
XX – (ink on paper, 10 x 10 in) “It is not good for man to be alone…” Women are beautiful, intricate, and so wonderful! We are the nurturers and comforters. We see and connect things men might not at first. We were made for them and they for us. Men and women are different but equally blessed.
TOGETHER – (ink on paper, 10 x 10 in) These spheres were made similarly to the “LTBL” series with more recognizable forms. Just as God designed man and woman, the paintings “XY” and “XX” were made with the same shape just different colors and forms. The painting of “Together” is supposed to be a culmination of the two.
There are pregnancies … And there are miscarriages.
POSITIVE – (fluid acrylic and ink on paper, 6 ½ x 4 ½ in) “It began with a positive test…” That second line was worth so much. More than silver or gold. This piece is small but displayed in a larger frame because the start of a life inside the womb is no small feat. Discovering your pregnant is one of the most exciting and overwhelming experiences. Your mind flurries with dreams and possibilities. Much like the shapes in the background, these thoughts are not fully formed, and develop over time.
SONOGRAM – (fluid acrylic, gold leaf, and ink on paper, 15 x 14 ½ in) “A tiny heart-beat, a sign of life…” I made this painting at the start of my pregnancy not knowing I would only finish it after my miscarriage. I wanted to be reminded of the joy of seeing my baby’s heart-beat flickering on the first sonogram. The second sonogram was so quiet with no movement, just dark shadow.
WORSHIP PARTNER – (fluid acrylic, ink, and gold leaf on paper, 10 x 9 in) “Was my baby worshiping God too? …” When Mary visited her cousin Elizabeth, the Bible explains that John leaped in his mother’s womb at the presence of Christ in Mary. The story made me wonder about my baby and gave me so much joy to know I was not alone when I sang to God in church service. This image describes what it felt like to hold that tiny life inside, and dream about what was going on inside.
LITTLE LIFE CYCLE – (fluid acrylic, ink, and gold leaf on paper, 18 x 13 ½ in) “Through the joy, and the pain of loss, God is sovereign.” This piece serves as a narrative of life’s different stages. The leaves grow up from the ground and sprout beautiful flowers. Death comes and brings pain. This is not the end though, Heaven is waiting! I used the blots of bright green to explore the positive feelings I had while carrying my baby and process my grief after losing it.
GOODBYE FOR NOW … – (fluid acrylic, ink, and gold leaf on paper, 18 x 16 3/4 in) “I will always remember…” Trees grow and in winter, lose their leaves. Sometimes when things look dark we start to recount other things that make us feel sad. I pray that although I can’t see them now I will get to see them some day. I will remember this and carry on until then.